sacrifice

And so it's Easter and everyone is heralding a change of heart and a new life. The priest in the homily today mentioned that other people are taking this literally - some are now sporting a new hairstyle and new pedicured nails. Hmm, I never thought of that but it's an interesting thought. I should probably have my hair dyed to a lighter color. And straighten it. Oh, wait. This new change costs much. Nah. I'll think of something else.

Anyway, yes, it's Easter, and the week before was Holy Week. Everybody is in the retreat, repent, and sin-no-more mode. It also seemed that everybody was giving up something or abstaining from something as a form of sacrifice. In my case, I gave up technology, specifically mobile phones and social media, for almost two days. Food, the usual - no meat. But since I do it on a conscious level especially with my diet and exercise, I felt it wasn't really sacrifice. 

But, well, this is sacrifice. 

It was Easter Vigil last Saturday at Santa Maria Parish, Gen. Blanco St., Iloilo City, where I serve as a choir member. Been serving the parish since 2000 and Holy Week is one of the busiest times to be serving. Easter Vigil Mass starts at 7PM and ends two hours later. Snacks were prepared for us before the mass and dinner after the mass. I found out that we had burgers from Love 'n Kisses, a famous local pizza place, as our snacks so I grabbed one and thought of sharing it with my husband later and proceeded to the dining hall for our dinner. I only had a small plate of spaghetti. I was so excited to fetch my hubby and share the burger with him because I haven't tried it yet. 

Lo and behold! There were two boys who presented themselves as having watched over my car at the parking lot. Since I don't give money as alms as a matter of principle and based from my series of bad experiences with beggars in the past, I had no choice but to give up my burger. I looked at it long and hard and said to myself: "It's alright. I can buy my own burger and I've just had a plate of spaghetti. They need it more than I do." So, I gave it to one of the boys and told him to share it with the other boy. Oh boy! He just got it from me and without smiling said a faint "thank you" and didn't call the other boy to share it with him! The other boy had to run after him! I was looking at them as I was driving away and muttered: "Sigh. Okay. I shared it with him and now he doesn't want to share it with others."

Should I really expect people to act in a certain way? Did I judge that boy correctly? What if he was really hungry? What if he was also denied food to be shared previously? What if he was actually pissed off at me for giving him food instead of money? When you give up something, do you really want the assurance that it was given up for a good reason? Or, do you just give it up and let go of it and not mind whatever happens to it?

When Jesus died for our sins, He knew exactly what He was doing. There was, however, no guarantee that we would all believe in Him and thank Him. Yet, He still did it. He just did it anyway.  

For love.